Hiding what I can

March 9, 2008

secret 1

Filed under: my Secrets — Tags: , — kagenohikari @ 7:41 am

I am afraid of failing… of loosing the reason to continue this…

Finals are almost over. Vacation is at hand’s reach. My future being good and peaceful becomes vague. I might fail in my subject, one or two. If that happens, I’ll loose my scholarship and all chance of returning to school and continuing the course I fought for with bluish bruises and anguish tears. I cannot simply put this away and have friends tell me that it will be okay. It won’t be. I cannot also keep this locked up inside and pretend its not remotely possible because it is and pretending would make reality collide with me harshly rather than bump into me gently.
Whatever the result turns out, I pray that I will still have the chance… that GOD won’t leave me and that my attempts aren’t in vain.

Honestly, I think I deserved it. I can pass the difficult subjects if I have only study harder. Too bad, everything is almost too late. I can only pray that it won’t be.


1 Comment »

  1. […] Back to the topic, I’m reopening myself to the ‘art world’. I’m making projects – ones that keep me occupied and at the same time stress-free. There’s this one project I’m very excited about. This project (named as SLNsky for now) will be revealed at the end of my last final exam to take. Drafts (pictures, not words) and characters will be posted everywhere – anywhere – despite the unsafeness the www emits. Another thing I need to do is update stories and post drawings (especially the ones that are untimely due). I’ll be also practicing to the fullest my potential as a student of the course I have chosen. I just hope I’ll still pass despite my fear… […]

    Pingback by secret 2 « Blue Beard’s Closet — March 9, 2008 @ 8:22 am

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